What was I thinking? saying? doing?

I know all you moms (and maybe dads) are going to know what I am referring to when I say Momnesia, the non-fatal condition also known as 'losing your mind'. I seem to be in a rather acute flare up of the chronic condition I developed shortly after the conception of my first child. Some professionals claim that it is the shifting of hormones or perhaps the lack of sleep which leads to the development of an complete and inability to remember things. Things like: phone numbers, appointments, making dinner, changing diapers (OK I threw that last one in so that Papaschnuck finally can understand all the times that the kids were walking around with their diapers sagging off their little heinies and hanging around their ankles. Incidentally, giving them the only acceptable form of 'plumber butt' that is looked upon with affection). Momnesia affects all women differently, and while I started with a mild form of it in June 2000, it has developed into such a full blown case that my family and friends now just nod knowingly when I mix up my children, the days of the week, and verbs and nouns. It is not uncommon for me to insist that a child needs to be put in the refrigerator as I call them "Juice". And to answer the obvious, yes the children derive great pleasure from my mental mix-ups. It seems more often these days, I look at them and wonder, "Why is he laughing?" I have to stop and think, and half the time I still don't know what I really said. I suspect at times, Papachnuck thinks that I am entering the early stages of Alzheimer's. I hope not.

Lately, I have been wondering why this might be happening and what can be done to try to improve my scatterbrainedness (how is that for a made up word? The spell check even told me ha ha). I think, quite simply, that it comes from the complete and inability to think anymore. I don't mean that I lack the ability, rather, I lack the opportunity to have contemplative moments these days. And you know what? I miss thinking. There is something to be said for having time to ponder and to theorize. I find that I am often busy with such mindless stuff throughout the day and am so often multitasking, my brain never gets to work coherently. Since it never happens, perhaps my brain has given up trying and just 'phones it in' when I need it to work. No wonder the wires get crossed.

I remember reading once (back when my brain was actually remembering things), that when we are introduced to someone, if we look carefully at their face and repeat their name to them and again in our head we will most likely remember it. Most people forget introductions due to inattention when being introduced. Evidently, we are all so concerned what we might say next that we don't really listen to the name. ( I took particular note of this a few years ago as I would have no idea the names of women I would see and talk to daily at the gym. It would stress me to no end that I would be caught and exposed as an idiot for not knowing their name after so many years. It would get more and more embarrassing to even think of having to ask them their name. I finally gave up the stress and just came clean and asked them their name. It would turn out they had no idea of my name either). Nowadays, I am doing better with people's names but after the last Schnuckie was born everything else has gotten worse. I used to have a great mind for remembering little bits of information, I can remember thinking, Who needs to write down phone numbers? Now, I can't even remember where I put the phone book. I have slowly come to accept my new limitations and have tried make necessary accommodations. At least I have yet to forget a Schnuckie at home or elsewhere (surprisingly enough), and as long as don't, I'm figure I'm OK.

I am gonna try to do better though, writing in this blog has at given me the opportunity to try to put together coherent thoughts despite the numerous interruptions I receive while typing- juice, snacks, lost legos, the phone,- all are unable to wait until mommy is done. Paying attention to things is important and I am constantly telling the kids to pay attention to me. It's time to try to practice what I preach and pay closer attention to things around me and try not to multitask myself into total incompetence. This will be another resolution for 2009.

Now, what was I doing before I sat down at the computer?.....