Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

Whew, I have lost the month of December.  Hard to believe that is will be 2010 in a few days.  What a year.  I had a couple of really tough weeks in the last month.  My planning wasn’t going well, and I was feeling like we had not accomplished enough for the year. Ben wasn’t doing well with his grammar (I have subsequently gotten a new curriculum). Matthew has really been pushing hard against math, he has hit a bump in where he does not like to perform the minutia of math, you know, the step by step calculations that are involved in most equations.  He prefers to do it in his head, and if he can’t then he has been refusing to do it.  Needless to say, I hit a low which was topped  off with us all getting a bout of the stomach bug last week.  We ended our semester early and are now on break.  I will need to make some tweaks for next year, planning that I will start next week.  I feel like I have let some of the fun of homeschooling go in an attempt to “get things done” .  I think that I need to try to do more unit studies, and try to tie in the grammar, spelling and handwriting into those larger projects.  Let math take off in a balance between what they like and what they must do.  Grammar will remain difficult but I think I need to be more involved in Ben working through it.  I also want to supplement Science and History for Ben as he needs to be pushed more.  He has taken an interest in Mythology and reading about it on his own over the break and I ought to exploit that.  And finally we need more field trips.

But anyway…… we are doing it.  Now, I am getting a much needed rest and I am enjoying the holiday season.  I would like to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.  As always, I will try to do better, and write more regularly next year, no matter the drama  or difficulty or lack of time.  My only plans at the moment: catching up on my sleep.  Merry Merry.

 

Peace

I sit here at 1:40pm on a Tuesday afternoon, we have yet to accomplish ANY academic work today, and surprisingly I am not panicking.  As I type, I look out the front window and see the kids (dressed in inappropriate clothing for a mild December  afternoon Including one pair of rain boots, an oversized short-sleeved soccer shirt, at least one barefoot and 2 in socks and not a coat to be seen) playing on the driveway and drawing on chalk.  They have been out there fro almost an hour after they departed the lunch table with a potato chip and a hammer to see what might happen (OK OK the result is predictable but you tell that to a group of enthusiastic scientists).  At any rate, I am sure we are solidifying the impression to all the neighbors that homeschoolers are crazy and the children are not only not educated but neglected to boot.

So, I sit here, 1:47 ( so, I’m a slow typer, so what?), fire crackling a few feet away from me,  puppies sleeping by the door and I realize it is actually peaceful in the house… dare I say quiet? You can be sure, I am NOT calling them back in to start their work.  It may be a late afternoon but  moments like this are far to precious to waste……oops here comes one, barreling inside (with a hammer). Oh well.  It was nice while it lasted.  OK then,  on to academics.

What I know... or at least think I know if I can only remember them.

I had a few rough days over the past week. My guess is that it was inevitable I might hit a low point as I proceed along this path. First of all,my memory and ability to retain dates, times, and places has been completely obliterated. Don't get me wrong, after 4 kids my ability to remember anything was, quite honestly, debatable in the first place. Add the complication of homeschooling and frankly I am surprised that I don't feel compelled to introduce myself to PapaSchnuck in the morning in the hopes he will remind me of his name.
So, after a few missed things - papers, assignments, phone calls, Sunday school snack, coats, cookie sales booth (that last one I messed up the time AND the location), I had a crisis in confidence. If I could not remember these simple things how the heck could I be trusted with the all important development of my children's learning? I mean if I screw up and don't bring a snack to Sunday pre-school, I get a couple of hungry cranky 3 year old's who will easily be soothed with a cookie and milk when they get home, BUT if I forget to teach my kids something they may be destined to wander the earth looking for the edge of it.
Second, the kids were terrible the end of last week and I began to doubt their ability to do this at home. I was giving them breaks on work (mostly for me) and then they were protesting more and more (I certainly learned that it does not help to cut assignments down without good reason). We weren't accomplishing much after our special day off on Monday and things didn't go smoothly after that. I was pretty tired and a wee bit overwhelmed (the puppies, while cute certainly take some time as well), a certain recipe for disaster.
Well, the good news is that the crisis has passed (somewhat) though I must say I have lost my faith in my memory completely and now am double checking everything. Over the past few months things have been going so well , it is not a surprise we had a rough patch. I know that there are going to be times that my kids are going to be grumpy and rebel against my teaching, I know that I will feel tired and cranky and yell at the kids and take my mood out on them. I know there will be days that we will soar and learn; and days we will fight and complain. I know that teaching is not only imparting knowledge but giving them the tools to find the answers on their own. I will soar with the joy that I feel when Jenny reads her stories to me and will still want to stick my head into the sand when they whine about how it is too hard and how they don't WANT TO DO IT ANYMORE!!! Overall, things really have been going well, I need to know that I shouldn't get mired down when we hit a few hiccups, it will pass.
So, we are having a lighter week this year and I plan to revamp a few things for after Thanksgiving and hopefully we will jump through to Christmas on a strong note. Now, if I could just find my recipe for turkey-.....
Happy Thanksgiving all.

Double Trouble

Oh my goodness we have puppies (Yes, more than one).  They are oh so very very cute. 

It has been 15 years since I have had a puppy and it is hard to remember how much time and energy they need.  But hopefully we will be able to put in the time (and energy) now, so they can turn out to be as good as our sweet boy Jake.  So…. what the heck were we thinking and why did we do this?

Our Lab Rescue Dog, Max has been having a great deal of difficulty for the past 6-9 months.  He had storm anxiety which was becoming worse and worse.  This week we had an incident where he got into a panicked state and ended up climbing on my 82 year old father-in-law (AKA Grandpa Bob) twice while the rest of us were out of the house.  He caused some (minor) injury to his arm and that made the decision for us.  We knew that despite our efforts to improve his behavior, it wasn’t getting better.  We had tried medication, behavioral training, aroma therapy (yes I had dog phernomes wafting through the house).  Not only had none of this worked but his anxieties were becoming worse and he was having these panic attacks even when there was no storm.  We made the very difficult decision that we had to relinquish him back to Lab Rescue.  It was a very hard and the kids were heartbroken but we did not want to take the chance that Max would hurt (inadvertently) one of the monkeys and now we had a real injury that couldn’t be ignored.  So we returned him with love and lots of tears, and a letter and the hopes that they can find him a home where he will not hurt anyone when he becomes panicked.

After a mere day in the house with no dog the house did not seem bearable, so, we set up some appointments for yesterday morning, and off we went. 

Well, we went to 2 places and we got two dogs, one from each place and cancelled our third appointment as we simply could not afford (or manage) a third.  They look like brothers but are actually 2 weeks apart.  We wanted brothers but they each had a sibling that looked different than they do and we liked their look so….

Anyway, the busy house just got busier and as for Grandpa Bob, he likes the new guys as well.

"It's too Hard; It's too Much; I Don't Want to Do It."

Well, I never thought it would be going so well but I must say I do get a bit of push back from the kids at various times. The top three complaints are detailed in the title of this post and the children are so able to attach a particular whine that makes the phrase stretch into next week all the while, driving a nail through my head. I have learned it is useless to try to convince them that it is NOT too hard, or too much and that I don't particularly care much about their motivation as long as the work gets done. So, I have adopted a rather novel approach which seems to work relatively well, I simply tell them "OK" and leave them be and move on to something else with someone else. Just like in a store when you walk away from the tantrum it miraculously stops. And likewise, these complaints dry up, tears stop, and eventually the books open up and work commences. I know that there will be a day where my bluff is called and then the consequences of 'no nothing' ( no TV, computer, video games, snacks, desserts, etc) until it is done will ensue as the day progresses but for now, the mere lack of an argument and the knowledge everyone else will finish and they will be left to keep working is enough pressure to bring them back to the table.
Today is a mixed day, we've had some resistance but are moving through our work very well. (Fingerprint Lab was a big hit) We have a few errands to run and the weather is too nice to be inside all day so I will toss them out in the backyard for a bit.
Then it is laundry time, I need to catch up on some I neglected over the birthday weekend. Its just that I don't want to do it....

Happy Birthday PapaSchnuck, Half a Century!

We have had a very busy week, Papaschnuck turned 50 on Friday.  Schoolwork, while completed and done fro the week definitely took a backseat to party and cooking preparations ( Luckily, its all good as that is the fun of homeschool). Lots of family and friends came to celebrate.  Despite a few hiccups (like losing my wallet the day before the party and the cake order getting mixed up), we had a great time and a lot of fun.  Good news,  3 of the 4 Schnuck  brothers were able to come and Grandpa and Grandma Schnuck arrived as well, add in a few friends and voila, we had a party.  Lots of work and lots of food and lots of fun.  And yes, I finally found my wallet.

So.... How Is It Going?

"Terrific" I say because you know what? It really is. Funny, I thought this process would be one that I find that I endure but am discovering that I am actually enjoying myself. Don't get me wrong: Jenny has quite the whine, and Nate is oh so troublesome, and Ben? doesn't like to get anything wrong ("Its not my fault!!!") as for Matthew- tears and utter despair when confronted with problems he doesn't understand. BUT, overall, we do our work, they vie for attention, they all talk at once, we use our computers, we pile in the car and go shopping or playing, or to a group or a meeting or the library and.... we like it.

The planning is cumbersome but the ease of the tracking software and responsibility they take when they input their work and keep their reading logs up and schedule their days, makes it worth it. Overall, they seem to be getting along better, and are happier (most of the time). It helps that they are getting enough sleep (I rarely wake a sleeping kid for school they just lose out on free time before lessons) they are monitored closely and we solve problems quickly. The umm, negative.. influences of public schools are gone, and they need to rely on each other to help clean, work, play... this helps them bond. In fairness, they get on each other's nerves, (and my own) and bicker frequently. But overall, there has been a lot of laughter in the house.
Mostly, I feel very free (but busy busy busy). I like to be able to move things around when I want, cancel lessons and go fly a kite when the weather is perfect (something we did and it was the best homeschool day thus far- a week or so ago). I wish I did more of that actually, but I find we are going out so much I try to make them have work hard (academically) Mon-Thursday, as we have co-op on Fridays (so no math or Language Arts or grammar on those days- just Phys-Ed, Art, Music, and Science). And on Tuesday and Thursday we go to the gym in the am and so we don't even start lessons until the afternoon, that is tougher for them. Morning is so much better for book work. Mostly the problems I have are my own issues, my failings at teaching, learning the wrong way how to motivate a frustrated child, losing my temper because they are being silly. Mostly, I hope to be more creative with lessons to chow them that sometimes learning is actually fun. I know that I am learning an awful lot (hello prepositions!) and I really am, having fun..

It has been almost a year since I made a decision about this.... much different than I thought it would be, but in a good way. I hope it continues.

Where does the time go?

I have a new appreciation for working mothers.  I always knew that it would be difficult to manage everything and do all that I used to.  The reality is, you can’t. There is no possible way to put more time into the day and so, things get dropped (like housekeeping and my blog).  I had heard that I might need to adjust my expectations but am having a hard time actually doing it. Cleaning has been relegated to the weekends, and with 4 kids that makes life infinitely messier. I don’t like it but have yet to figure out how exactly to deal with it.  We are experimenting with different strategies, all involving various violations of child labor laws. 

As for blogging, I have taken a month off after promising to write more frequently and so I feel rather foolish making  another statement regarding my intentions to do better.  Suffice to say, lets try again, If I make more frequent but shorter posts, which is the goal, I may be able to find more success and not view it as a chore as I have been.  I find that I so enjoy the writing process and often feel the need to be profound that I put off and put off my writing, to try to think of the perfect post and then find the energy to compose it, that I decide it is too much effort and never blog about anything anymore.  It is so much easier to think, “ Ahh, I’m tired now , I’ll do it later.”  So, if I just try to find one thing, every day to comment on (or maybe a few times a week) then perhaps I can find the balance between brevity, interest and ease of posting.  So lets give it another go shall we?

Yes I am still alive

One month in and so much for carefully documenting each and every precious moment of my wonderful homeschooling experience.  I don’t mean to sound too cliché but I am so very very busy.   I feel as though I haven’t had much time at all to get all the things done that I am required to do, much less dither around on a self indulgent blog.  I had so hoped to record every difficulty, every frustration, each and every agonizing argument over school work, alas that has not come to pass.   Truth be told- we have been remarkable drama free.  For the most part, the kids have been on task and motivated, they have undertaken the activities and shuttling around in the van with ease (if not a wee bit too much enthusiasm as they tend to get a bit loud in the van) and for the most part I have managed to be flexible enough to roll with the inevitable changes that have derailed my carefully structured days.  In fact this week, I blew off academics two days in a row.  One was my birthday and one we just were to busy with filed trips, and gym and looking for Halloween costumes.  (We are headed off an a Halloween Camping weekend up at Jellystone Park in PA.  It is always so strange to go and get all the Trick-or-Treating done and then return home and still have weeks to go until everyone else catches up.

But we are doing surprisingly well.  I have been saying that I am actually having fun.  It seems I am repeating my experiences with parenting.  Something I figured I would have to endure and (to my delight)I find out how fun and rewarding it is.  Don't’ get me wrong, I have my moments, and evening is still tough but we are all getting along well and I think the kids are actually enjoying themselves as well.  There is less fighting and moodiness and they seem more relaxed and happier.  The honeymoon is waning and they do complain a bit more about the work but I continue to work on my flexibility and thy to remember that its OK if we change plans, drop an assignment or take a divergent path- that is why we decided to homeschool and we might as well enjoy the path we’ve chosen.  Last week a neighbor was taking down a tree so we went out on the driveway, set up chairs, and proceeded to eat lunch outside and discuss the wonders of pulleys and hydraulics, chainsaws and weight of limbs, back cuts and safety harnesses.  After the tree was all down we went over and counted rings and looked a the insect infestation.  I scrapped my other science lesson and we were all the better for it.

Stick a Fork in Me!

So, things are going well but I find that by the end of the day, certainly after dinner has been put away and cleaned up I am DONE! Absolutely finished with the patience and love and kindness I try my best to be (hold on let me yell ay my daughter for coming in to ask me a question “ Be quiet I am busy now, can’t I do anything without interruption? grrrrr”) Ok I am back . Where was I??? Darn it keeping a thought in my head is harder than keeping snacks in the pantry. Patience has never been my strong suit but I am doing my best to try to exude calm and patience all day but by the end of the day I am tired and want to just gather my thoughts and have some quiet , ‘me’ time. It is complicated because Tuesday-Thursday Perry ( OH, I forgot to ‘out’ him on my last post huh? well you got me, PapaSchnuck’s Christian name is: Perry) coaches the boys in soccer and Monday and Friday are scout meetings. That means I have Nate and Jenny all the time and after a rushed and scrambled dinner off a few go and here I am and, because I am human, I get weary of it. Fall has always been challenging but I guess I am thankful that the ‘get off the bus, hurry do your homework and open your mouth as I shove food down your throat to get practice at tonight ‘ is not happening anymore, the rush just seems to start at breakfast now…

Activities complicate a well oiled machine

Well, let me be more precise, they make it slightly harder to do all the things that are suppose to get done, without more juggling.  But we are managing.  I am really and truly amazed at how easily this seems to be flowing.  Who’d a thought that they would not only accept their assignments but also embrace them.  Schnuckie 7 and 9 are both pretty much managing their own time and coordinating with me for the teaching part of the lessons.  Then I try to juggle Schnuckie 3 and 5 into the mix, trying to pay more attention to 5 in order to provide her the required teaching but not park 3 in front of the TV too much.  Wait,

OK OK STOP-  This is to hard, I just can’t be expected to think in code, I keep having to go back and cover their names and now I am numbering them.  ENOUGH! Ben is my 9 yr old; Matt is 7; Jenny (Jenny-pie) is 5 and Nate (Nater-tater tot) is 3.  There, it’s out there, for all the world to see.  I am sorry PapaSchnuck but I can’t do it anymore. Now I won’t get mixed up and can not worry about ant anymore.

SO.. where was I?  we have added in activities and have found that  this seems to make the coordination of academics a bit more challenging, but we are figuring it out.  It is so much nicer to go to the playground than tackle Math, or hit the Ma and Pa hiking Trail than try to memorize prepositions.  We are adding in Art club for all, gymnastics for 2, and a few other fun things and its miraculous how the hours melt away during the day.  So far we are doing OK.  On we go…

Three Day Weekends Rock ! (especially after your first week of Homeschooling)

Well, we made it.  Actually, I think we did excellent.  We leapt into work as the kids seemed to settle into the schedule rather easily.  Schnuckie7 did 4 weeks of Math in his workbook in 4 days. (I guess that does not surprise me.  I started him on grade level and told him to “have at it” and let me know when he gets stuck then we can actually begin lessons).  Nate has been challenging but we are getting things done (OK, OK, you caught me, I admit it, I have used the TV as a babysitter, hey what are you going to do?, I needed him out of my hair, and in my defense he watched no more than an hour a day).  Overall, though it was much smoother than I expected, really only a minimum of moaning and groaning would accompany the assignments.  For the most part the kids are logging on the computer, getting their assignments and scheduling their day out.  The younger ones need a bit more direction with this than the eldest but for the most part they only need to work me into the lesson planning (for when I need to teach- I can’t do more than one at any given time. I must say I am really proud of them, and Schnuckie5 whom I had anticipated having the most issue with has taken to ‘school time’ with gusto and really seems to enjoy it.   Dare I say, last week was fun??? But exhausting.

By Friday, I was whipped.  I mean I really was worn out.  Luckily Papaschnuck had the foresight to arrange for a day out for me.  Of course it wasn’t at the day spa (which would have been fabulous!!).  But it was at a Women on Target Rifle Course at an area Gun Club.  My goodness what fun it was, though the noise did result in a headache.

I learned all about gun safety, gun parts and had the opportunity to shoot a variety of different rifles, including a 1860’s Springfield Muzzleloader and a 50 caliber rifle.  Again, lots of fun and very enjoyable but the start of a busy 2 days of BBQ’s, friends, and fun.  Luckily on Labor day, I was able to relax, do some planning (take a 2 hour nap) and get myself ready for this week. And on we go…..

First Blood

Well, we made it.  Granted, we really didn’t do any academics beyond silent reading for the boys, a reading lesson for Schnuckie5, and some tracing squares sheets with Schnuckie3, but it was a rousing success. Of course we had our moments, most notable when the guinea pig accidentally bit Schnuckie3’s finger tip and caused massive bleeding in the Living room, along with panic and screaming from the rest of the gang (note to self: teach how to be calm in an emergency). OK OK I am exaggerating a wee bit, but there was quite a bit of blood, enough to call Papaschnuck and bring him home from work as I thought I’d be heading to the ER for a quick stich or glue.  As it turned out I was able to stop the bleeding and went to the pediatrician an obligatory Dr visit to get his waiver of liability to the tune of a $25.00 co-pay.  Of course, we need to clean it out three times a day, keep it wrapped up and it will be better in a week.  I am thinking that he may carry a scar his whole life (or at least it will alter his fingerprint) but hey- what a great first day of school story.

So we got through it.  The kids came up with some fun ideas.  The Lego reward system was the best- where by they earn bricks which can then be used to “buy” things = rewards like candy and toys= at Mom’s school store (which means I am taking a trip to dollar store in the near future).  We reviewed books, organized drawers, set a schedule, played a few games, played a lot with Legos and I think, we had a good day.

Tomorrow  we will start math and continue with reading.  Also will take the nature hike/scavenger hunt we missed today.  Lets hope there will not be another impromptu health lesson as well.

And we’re off!

I know I have been absent for a few weeks, but I am back, and we are getting ready to start HOMESCHOOLING on Monday!!!  I simply can not believe that it has been 9 months since I made my decision.  How long ago it seemed.  I have done so much to get ready.  From transforming the room, to researching and purchasing curriculum, from joining  support groups, and daily mental pep talks,  I do not think that there is anything else I could have done to prepare myself for Monday.

This week we will spend time getting acquainted with our schedule, and routine.  We will peruse texts and workbooks, review organizing and chores, we will prepare drawers and set up lessons.  I am hoping to ease into our year and not begin academics until after Labor Day (as it should be).  So off we go, come on along for the ride, its going to be an adventure…

Love means never having to say you’re sorry

Yeah right!

I never understood that premise when I heard it on ‘Love Story’ and though a nice catchy phrase, it seems to me that the people that you should apologize to, are those who (whom? to whom? I am going to have to figure that out when to use ‘whom’ correctly if I am going to help the kids write well) you DO love. It is when you have contempt or even worse, no feelings at all for the offended party, that an apology seems to be much harder to choke out. It is the people we love that we often feel compelled to apologize to, to fix the wrong, to be able to move on. You don’t need to move on with people that you don’t care about. I often have to make my kids apologize to each other, because it is a valuable exercise and they need to learn to do it (and do it right) just as they learn to tie their shoes.

So, of course, I began to wonder, where does apologizing originate? Being the modern mommy, I Googled ‘History of an apology’ and up came a page which defined it as thus:

The word apology comes from the Greek word apologos meaning "away" + "word" (or "speech"), and in its original connotation meant a speech in defense of a position. An apologia, or a speech away from the speech already given, was a common feature in Greek and Roman law courts.

Apologies are closely related to confessions and to excuses. The difference between these is that unlike confessions and excuses, apologies involve negotiation and agreement. Skilled negotiators are also successful apologizers.

Interesting huh? Now, my dad, Grandpa Luecke, would have been able to nail that first bullet point as he has been studying ancient Greek for a number of years now, and I must admit it nudged my brain a bit so I must have heard it in my other life (before my kids drained the memory banks of my brain). But it is the second part which I had to think about for a minute (again, the writing a blog seems to take forever as cognizant thought is near impossible while dealing with four monkeys and their constant interruptions). It struck me that it was a pretty good breakdown. Apologies are as much for the person giving the apology as for receiving it. It is a shared experience: an excuse to the person, (to help relieve them of the responsibility?) and a confession for the self, (to assuage your guilt over the wrongdoing?) and the negotiation that we can move on from this. So by definition, you must care for the person you are apologizing to (if you mean it) in order to even have the desire to excuse your error and relieve your guilt.

Now, the last two lines of the second bullet point make even more sense when you understand that I found this on a risk management site which specialized in the art of the apology. They had another heading titled, “Apology Avoidance”, of course, I investigated, and found these gems:

Apology Avoidance

1. Create the Context. The most important strategy for avoiding an apology is managing relationships well enough so that apologetic situations never arise.
2. Prevent the Pitfalls. Every business relationship involves a implicit or explicit contract. If you clearly understand the contract, you will NEVER need to apologize.
3. Manage the Message. If for some reason your techniques of apology avoidance fail, then you should fall back onto managing the message.
4. Recognize the Wrong. When all else fails you should recognize the wrong. By doing so you can usually avoid costly litigation

Here is the hidden lawyer in me in no way to I purport this to be an accurate definition nor lay claim to its creation, credit for the above cites to Logos Apology at logosapology.com

I don’t know, I could go in and pick it all apart but suffice to say, it just made me sad (but really put into context the recent apologies and non-apologies I have heard on TV lately) . There are business created to avoid apologizing and people actually pay for these services. It certainly manages the admitting the error piece but I wonder what that does to the forgiving of the self part of the equation? Our world would be much nicer if we could just apologize (and hug when necessary as determined by mommy) and be able to move on without fear of retribution or lawsuits.

I have begun to accept, (as I try to maintain my blog), that I go off on tangents that are, at times, immaterial to the point I intended when I began. It’s funny actually, I almost always start in one direction and inevitably find myself walking a path that is often different form my original intent and almost seems, laid out in front of me. If you haven’t enjoyed the stroll, well…

“I’m sorry”

Here’s to Patience and Persistence

Well, I had decided this summer to teach Schnuckie5 to read.  We had a half hearted attempt at it in the spring but I did not like the program (and neither did she).  I then found The Reading Lesson , (Michael Levin, MD Charan Langton, MS). The first few lessons went really well and she was catching on to phonics and seemed to be proud of herself and her accomplishments.  She even began reading Bob books by herself and we tried to make a big deal about it.  We did not do a lesson everyday but instead a few days a week.  I also began asking the boys for a quiet 1/2 of reading to help set the mood.  Ideally this daone with Schnuckie3 napping (Boy oh Boy I hope he will keep napping for another year).

Then, of course, it was bound to happen, the other day she balked at the lessons,and refused to finish. I made some half hearted effort to let her know that there would be consequences to failing to finish, but y’know, life grabbed hold of me and off we went, swimming, and play dates, snacks and TV. Though I should have known better, I let it go for a thinking in the back of my mind, hmmmm this is a mistake, next time it’s going be worse.

Cue this afternoon. When I informed her that she needed to finish the two pages from her last lesson and do her next session with me today, she refused.  “Fine” I told her, “ but don’t come asking for anything until you do what I asked you.  Of course, an hour later when it was time to have a snack and the boys wanted to watch TV she flipped out when she realized that I meant what I had said: no snack, no TV, no nothing, until her lesson was done.  I never yelled or screamed (Does speaking in that teeth clenched, ‘I really really mean it’ voice count?) but I insisted that she do her lesson.  After 5 tantrums and 3 runs to the bedroom in tears,  and countless whines, 2 1/2 hours later we finished our work.  Every time she started to complain, I disengaged and informed her that I would be waiting to help her finish when she was ready.  Every time she came back (crawling at one point), I welcomed her back enthusiastically, and then if she did not respond with at least neutrality, I’d send her off again to “return when she was ready to learn”.  But we did finish we did (finally) and she was able to get on with life and hopefully see that I am serious when I ask her to do work. 

I suspect this was the very first of a long series of battles I will face as we begin (OH MY GOODNESS we are getting close).  I know that they will enjoy things in the beginning but very quickly become disillusioned with the joy that is school work.  So, I hope to follow the model I used today.  No yelling, no screaming, just persistence that the work must be done before the fun.  I can’t wear myself out on one kid and try to scream them into submission.  Instead, I need to help them realize that it is in their best interests to finish the work and all the while keep my sanity (what’s left of it) intact. 

Franklin Hills Sloppy Jake, my sweet sweet boy.

Our 14 1/2 year old Yellow Lab passed away this past weekend. I had to tell the kids while we were up in NJ visiting my mom. They were devastated and it was one of the hardest things I have had to do as a parent as I had to bring them such pain and sadness. Papaschnuck got Jake from a breeder from Scranton PA when he was a mere 8 weeks old. Sweet, sweet Jake was a wonderful boy, really the best. Just dumb enough never to question any command; gentle enough to tolerate all four monkeys at all ages; tolerant enough to handle other dogs and a cat sharing the house, kind enough to patiently wait while everyone in preschool petted him during a party and lovable enough to always have a wet sloppy kiss waiting.

Jake gave us 14 1/2 years of the best and hopefully lived everyday as contentedly as he appeared to. He was truly like a child to me (before I actually had children) and a dog that was both special and rare in a kind of way you don't fully appreciate until they are gone. I will miss his sweet face, his eager tail, and his lovable self. Rest in Peace darling, after all these years, you deserve it.

Blueberries and kiddies

This time of year at the Schnuck Estate, something wondrous happens: the blueberries arrive. We were blessed with a small blueberry thicket off the driveway that we happily discovered 2 months after we moved in in 2001. Dark blue berries began falling off the branches and I wandered over to investigate. Evidently the people who originally owned the house were renown for growing organic stuff (vegetable, cherries, blueberries) and we are happily reaping the benefits of their prior efforts as we do little to nothing to earn this wondrous treat. I neither spray nor protect them from animals and still manage to get plenty to freeze and give away. Occasionally we whack off a branch of two in a vain attempt to pretend we are "managing" the bushes. Yet they continue to come, year after year, providing us with free fruit all year long. In fact we often finish up the last of the frozen berries the week or so before they come in again. (Our blueberry treat of choice is smoothies- put yogurt, frozen blueberries, strawberries, banana and some OJ in a blender, wizz up and serve.)
Anyway, the blueberries are in and they are such a magnificent example of the wisdom of Mother Nature. First of all, the left and and center right bushes start turning blue first. Often giving most of their berries before the rest of the bushes start. (Another interesting thing is different varieties evidently are necessary with cross pollination and such- we must have 2 or 3 slight variations out there) Each bunch has quite a few berries in them and they all turn blue slowly, at different times. You usually see 1-3 ripe berries amid a cluster of hard green berries. So you pick one or two from each bunch, and return for more later. This is perfect as you are not inundated with berries all at once but get the same amount from the bushes each day or so for a few weeks. Nature's way of doling out her treats.

Now, picking berries is my brief therapy most days as I sneak out, away from the madness of the asylum, and pick for 20 minutes or so. During this time I think, and this year I am thinking about children's needs and my ability to manage multiple levels of teaching, multiple kids, all at the same time. So, I began thinking that perhaps something can be learned from the humble blueberry bush. Initially I thought, how nice it would be if the kids were like the blueberries, ripening at their own speed and being ready to be picked all at different times. Me, popping in to pluck them off the shrub, careful not to disturb the one to them. However, I don't really believe this would happen as I know the kids are more like a group of Piranha than blueberries and they tend to circle and swarm in unity. Instead I hope that maybe I will be more like the blueberry bush, and be able to hand out what is needed when it is time. Offer it up and it will be picked off by the kids and consumed. Nice theory, I know, but theories don't always bear out so I have a back up plan: to make them learn and stay on task, I can always bribe them all with blueberry smoothies.

4th of July

Happy Independence Day

This is one of my favorite holidays as there is something really great about a small hometown parade. My oldest (this year, two of them) Cubscouts are always on a float in the parade and seem to have a ball. I usually park myself on the curb and cheer with the other Schnuckies at all the interesting floats. The variety is terrific: from the local Ice Rink, to the Public Works dump Trucks, all the various Miss Maryland (and jr. misses), to Uncle Sam on stilts (Who, I noticed,was actually a woman this year, so auntie Samantha).The firetrucks, and baton twirlers and every local High school (public and private). The usual politicians came through, some receiving more enthusiam than others. (I myself have some issues with our govenor and out representative, but that is another blog). What fun, and even more so watching through the eyes of a child. Small town America.

GOD BLESS AMERICA!

Happy 4th of July!

Oh so quiet.

What was I thinking? Homeschooling means the kids will be home with me, all the time.    This week I have had an unbelievable experience, I got a glimpse into what life would be like if I sent the oldest ones off to school this fall. The three oldest Schnuckies went off to cub scout camp this week with Papschnuck volunteering all week.  (8am-4pm hee hee hee).  They let siblings 4 and older attend a ‘tag-a-long’ program if an adult is participating in the festivities.  Next year I will no longer have a ‘baby’ at home and most likely will join the sweating adults herding kids around the Equestrian Center all week.  However,  this week I have been left home with Relentless, umm I mean Schuckie3. 

What a revelation it has been.  This one kid business??  Its a cake walk (now mid you I never thought so when I first had only one) going up in number of children is a progression and a learning process.  Going down however… heavenly.  I have never accomplished so much in one day since having children.  This is what my life would be like if I sent them all off to school next year.  It is tempting given the amount of things I found I was able to do in a single day.    Let me describe my first day, Monday.  I got up and had breakfast,  read the paper and got a shower and dressed. I then folded 5 loads of laundry while doing 3 more.  I cleaned up the kitchen and dining area (twice) and I mopped the kitchen floor and the dining room floor (hey I do it once a year at least).  I changed the sheets on my bed, and cleaned my bathroom.  I sealed the grout in the kids new bathroom, I went grocery shopping.  I bought $300.00 worth of groceries, brought them home and put them away.  I went to the shoe store and bought  Schnuckie5 a new pair of sneakers (which ultimately didn’t fit and had to be returned, I have got to figure out a successful way to buy kids shoes without their actual feet with me).   I cut the grass, front and back yard, and grilled chicken for dinner.  Also, I had the best treat ever, I took an almost 2 hour nap.  It was amazing.

I got so much done on Monday I decided, unlike the Lord, I would rest on the second day, and made it a point not to do anything at all except go to the gym and the pool, and take a nap. That was pretty amazing as well.

Happy Birthday Schnuckie9

Well, the end of birthday season has finally arrived.  After a very late night sleepover with a few of his friends, my sweet little boy, my oldest has turned NINE!  I almost cannot believe that he is close to double digits. 

This boy came into the world,(fighting hard to stay in) all 9lbs 11oz of him, and made me a mother.  My life hasn’t been the same since.  He was my serious kid.  The one who didn’t smile much at all, but now jokes and laughs and had just begun to appreciate the subtly of humor.  The child who watched the world to figure out how to do things and when he decided to do them off he would go.  Standing at 6 months old, pulling up and walking at 7 months old, and off and running by 9 months.  He is a smart and creative kid.  He is a caring, loving boy who, thankfully, still enjoys snuggling with his mother (but I never told you that) I am blessed and proud to have him as a son.  

 

I LOVE YOU SWEETHEART!

 

 

School’s out….

“Schooooool’s out for summer!  Schoooool’s out for-eveah!” (Alice Cooper).

The song has been rattling around my head for the past few days.  The boys had their last day of school last week and were a bit sad, a bit excited, and overall, looking forward to having a great summer.  Schnuckie7 was a little teary as he contemplated never seeing his friends again.  Now, this is not the truth but as his best friend is moving he has been a bit teary to realize that not only is he losing his best friend but he will also no longer be surrounded by those friends he has had in classes over the past few years.  Shnuckie 9 is convinced that he will return for 5th grade after this grand experiment in homeschooling, and Schnuckie 5 has just informed me that she wants to go to ‘big school’ where the boys go, just for a year and ‘do the homeschool thing in 1st grade’.  Hmmm.  Well regardless. For at least a year school is out and we are heading on down the path we started in November.  September 1st is coming, we are a homeschooling family now.

Public education

I really don’t want this to be a rant on public education, but hey, why not?  I have a very typical viewpoint as I believe that our country’s education is terrible but “my school” (not mine anymore) is pretty OK.  Let me qualify though, while I really like the boy’s (former) elementary school, I do not think it is good for my children.  I think they do the best they can, given the restrictions, the expectations, and the teacher unions. (not to my teacher friends, I do not mean the teachers themselves) but rather the collective bargaining unit which dictates things and has basically made as much of a mess of the education system, as the UAW has of the car industry.  Mostly I mean, that competition and choice are removed from parents.  You must attend the school you live near regardless (yes yes, I know that you can get a few boundary exceptions but you know what I mean").  To me this is like telling people ,

“Well, you can only shop at a the one grocery store that is closest to your house.  Sorry, too bad that the one across town has fresher produce, or the one in the next neighborhood always has that sausage that your husband likes.  If you don’t like it, you are welcome to go to the private ones what cost 10x as much (though you still need to pay for the local one) and buy whatever you like…..What?  Oh you can’t afford to go to those??? Well, then stop complaining and enjoy the one you are assigned to, learn to live without those sausages, and be happy with what you have, at least the store has food, unlike those stores in the inner city.

 

Makes no sense does it?  At any rate, I digress, my point is not to complain or redesign the entire education system, (though I’d love to and would be damn good at it ) it is actually to post an article I read this morning about how our failing education system is negatively impacting our economy.  For me, the greater point of the article is more that our standards are a fantasy and the results are worthless.  In order to improve education in our country we need to get real about where we actually are.  International standards seem to be a good start.  And shame?  a great motivator for sure.

Here is Laura Vanderkam’s article from USA Today: http://blogs.usatoday.com/oped/2009/06/the-permanent-recession.html

She also has a blog, worth a look: http://giftedexchange.blogspot.com/2009/06/permanent-recession.html

The Room

Well, we are moving along on the room.  Things are starting to come together and it is beginning to look like a place, where we at least have the environment to learn.  My very good friend’s husband was fortuitously closing a office and I was able to get some really terrific (slightly) used office chairs and tables for  price I couldn’t refuse down.

This is my desk, I confess, I love it.  I am already using is as often as I can. The artwork is from those little Schnuckies.  I found some “floating” frames at Joanne’s on sale and bought a bunch.  They have 2 panes of glass you place the wart work between and it makes them look terrific and displays them rather professionally.

 In a rampant fit of domesticity, I actually made the curtains.  I used my grandmother’s sewing machine (ancient but a work of art). Though the hems suffer a bit, they are all the same length and I for a novice, I think they look really great.

 

 

PapaSchnuck has been working on the computer network system and has managed to link up my laptop with two desktops and a few printers, (mostly wireless I might add)  Very neat to sit here and print in the other room or send a document to another computer.  Best of all, since he figured out how to do it all, he is my new IT Geek, and if there is a problem  he can fix it. 

This is one of the desks for one of the student computers, but it is temporary as Papschnuck is going to make a long wrap-around the wall desk-top (I’ll update the picture when its done)'.

 

The book case (thought I have others, this is “THE BOOKCASE” ) is huge and my books look positively meager in it despite the fact that I have been accumulating curriculum for months.

I went to a used homeschool book sale the other day and snagged a bit more.  I know I will look back on this picture and laugh as I will be overflowing before too long.  Happily, Schnucks love books.

Another desk provides even more space to write and learn.  I must admit, I had my doubts about making a “classroom” but I think it looks good and the kids are excited.  Its getting closer…

Well, there goes Mother-of-the-Year…(again)

So,  my daughter was invited to a birthday party over the past weekend.  She received the invitation to a birthday party.  This little girl, lets call her Poppy, is a very very good friend of Schnuckie5, and before Poppy entered Kindergarten last fall, they spent a great deal of time together. While, she hasn't spent as much time with her this year, Poppy remains one of my daughters closest and longest friend.

At any rate, I told Schnuckie5 about the party (a gymnastics party) and she began to get excited.  As the days got closer and closer her excitement grew.  A special trip to the store was embarked on to pick the perfect gift. Which, I must say, was a terrific gift as it was temporary hair tattoo cream.  Poppy, being a blond has the perfect hair to streak.  And, as an added bonus, this was sure to drive Poppy’s mom a wee bit crazy (she happens to be my very good friend so I am allowed).  The gift was brought home and wrapped.  Not only was it wrapped, but the wrapping paper was drawn on and pictures were created extolling their friendship and the excitement of the event.  Small, child-like hieroglyphics designed to convey the importance of the upcoming festivities.

The next day, Saturday (the day before the party), much time was spent creating the perfect card.  More pictures were drawn, balloons and cake, little girls performing gymnastics feats on uneven bars and very carefully copied words wishing good cheer on a special day.  The card was carefully taped to the gift to prevent it from being lost.  The day passed, oh-so-slowly.  Schnuckie5 would occasionally cheer for Sunday to come and the party to finally be here.  She hurried to bed without a fuss in a vain attempt to get the party to come more quickly.

Sunday morning came swiftly and suddenly, as I awoke to the panicked wailing of the house alarm.  It was set off by none other than Schnuckie5 who awoke early and was trying to help by feeding the dogs (in the garage).  She was dressed in her leotard and ready to go to the party.  I explained (again) that the party was not going to be until 2:00 and she had all day to wait.  She cheerfully answered me that she knew and then patiently told me (in that little girl logic) that she just wanted to be ready.  The day crept by, minutes feeling like hours. Schnuckie5 would occasionally ask “How much longer till we can go?”  or “Mommy, is it time to go yet?”.  But she was very good.  Finally, at 1:35pm I informed her it was time.  She got her shoes on in a flash and had the present in hand.  I grabbed my packet (ever the prepared mom, I had printed out the e-mail with details of the party , with the address, as well as a Google map of my destination, carefully stapled into a packet) and my keys and we hopped in the van.  I figured we would be a few minutes early so looked at the map again to make sure I knew where was going and checked the e-mail one last time.  That's when I saw it……… clear as day……..a very important detail I had somehow garbled…… the.time. of.the.party.:

12:30 till 2:30pm

OH NO!  my heart dropped and I couldn’t believe it.  We actually had missed the party.  This event that was so important to my daughter, was almost over. I swallowed hard and then carefully explained to her that I had really messed up and gotten the time wrong, and the party was actually almost over, and that I was so sorry.  I babbled a bit and can’t remember all my sputtering, I felt so bad.  I called my friend, apologized to her,and got moving down the road.  After a few minutes of listening to me continue to apologize, Schnuckie5 quietly said, “ Its OK Mom, maybe we can still get there in time to give Poppy her present”.   

We got there in time to have a piece of cake and watch Poppy open her presents. Nothing she opened was as great a gift as I got that day, my daughter’s forgiveness.  Lord knows, it will be a while before I will forgive myself.

A Clean House

I find I have a new worry about homeschooling.  Cleaning the house.  What, pray tell, does one have to do with the other? you might ask.  I have been thinking a lot about my inability to manage the regular drudgery of housework as it is, not to mention what happens when I undertake a new (full-time) job.  Now, in theory,I am able to keep up with the dishes, laundry, straightening, putting away stuff and all that other mindless junk that must occur daily.  But, the reality is, that something  will happen causing a backlog in one area, resulting in a backlog of another area as I fix the first one and so on and so on.  My mother recently visited  and helped me fold 7 (yes seven!) loads of laundry that had accumulated following a camping trip.  I kept piling the laundry in baskets and thinking to myself, OK I’m gonna fold that tomorrow,  well after 3 days of that and a growing unwashed pile I began feeling overwhelmed.  Finally, Mom came to visit, and helped me fold, pile, and put away (and we did another 2 loads while we accomplished that).  So, it got done, and the relief for me was almost palpable.  I felt lighter and freer, out from the heavy load (literally) .  But it only takes an off day to get behind.   It then gets so easy to say Eh I’ll do it later. In a way it is kind of like debt.  Once you get into debt, and you feel like you can’t pay it off, it gets easier to slip deeper and deeper (an experience I have had in the past and is much harder to get out from under than than a dirty house). 

So the house cycles, it gets dirty and things build up.  The shortcuts I take when cleaning become larger problems to manage (piling things into a drawer to hide them from company only works for so long before you have to spend a considerable amount of time to clean out the drawer- only to start stuffing it again the next week).  Eventually,  I lose my mind, scream and yell, and break child labor laws in numerous states, to whip things back under control.  But how am I going to get it all done AND homeschool?  Should be an interesting adjustment.  Suffice to say that we all will have to  put up with a bit more, pitch in a bit more,and overall try to let go a bit more. 

Thanks Mom and Dad

Anyone who has ever been on the internet comes across many many You Tube videos.  There is an awful lot of stuff floating around out there ( I get scared when the boys want to watch them as you never know what kind of language may be hidden in “crazy pet videos”). But, every now and then one really speaks to me and today it was this:

Amazing, wonderful, and uplifting.  I am proud to say that I belong on that list as well.  My thanks and love to my mom and day for picking me and giving me everything that I needed to become who I am.   I love you both.

Graduations: Big and Small

I went to two graduations in the past week.  First was for, hmm I  guess I ought to call her Schnuckie21 as she is my beautiful stepdaughter whom I have watched grow into a fine young lady.  The whole bunch traveled down to Virginia (Radford University) and were able to celebrate this very momentous achievement.  A big step for a very smart young woman.  It was a very nice time, with efforts made by the graduate to try to accommodate many different families, people, and personalities.  She hosted a nice lunch on her special day and made great effort to ensure that everyone was happy, all the while she ought to have been selfishly celebrating herself. I can’t say enough about her character. Unfortunately, she is struggling to find  a job in this market but we are very very proud of her and her achievement. 

My second graduation was slightly less spectacular but very special as well.  Schnuckie5 graduated from pre-school.  All the kids were moving on to Kindergarten and Jenny proudly announced, when asked that she was going to be homeschooled.  It was a very sweet and small little cceremony.  Grandma and Grandpa dutifully traveled from NJ to bear witness as they did for the older boys, and it was a very nice time.  It has bought my nostalgia back for schools and ceremonies, for marking of accomplishment and achievement.  Little Schnuckie3 may never go through a graduation with a class but perhaps I ought to try to make sure I mark passages with pomp and circumstance as much as I am able.

 

Congratulations to the Graduates

New Computer

Well, I had a really fun post on my new computer but somehow in my excitement, I lost  the whole posting.  Papaschnuck came home on Monday with a new laptop.  It was a Mother’s Day/ Homeschool gift. Never underestimate that man’s ability to multitask.  (Hey it really beat the “It broke and we really need another one”/Christmas vacuum that I got a few years ago).  At any rate.  The Schnuck’s have a new computer, (actually 2 as we also have another desktop that was given to us by a good friend) and Papaschnuck is busy making a home network for the (now) three computers.  The goal is to help in homeschooling as we want to be able to utilize technology to make things easier.  And with everything that is designed to make your life easier it requires an enormous effort to set up and use effectively.  So we are off and running in our new home network, well maybe we are limping along at this point as things are not fully functional, but it is exciting.  In the meantime I am busy exploring my new toy.  By far, the most fun, besides the mobility, is the built in web camera.  Here let me show you:

there I am, at the kitchen table, typing away.  And Schnuckie8 is down on the other computer and I do not even begrudge giving it up as I now have my own.  I hope that this new toy I mean tool, will allow me the ability to better blog, better organize, and more effectively teach (not in that order).

wheeeeeeee!!!!!

Happy Mother's Day

I was getting out of my car the other day at a store, parked next to another minivan (I know people have baggage with minivans but what other vehicle can carry 5 kids or a couple of sheets of plywood?? Come on, it really is the perfect, albeit ugly, vehicle) But I digress, so I happened to look into the front seat of the van next to me ( yes, yes, yes, I am a Nosy Nellie as well, but you would be amazed at what people leave in plain sight in their cars), and stuffed into the drink holder was a handful of wilted dandelions. I myself just tossed a couple of butter cups and those purple lawn flowers out of my car an hour earlier. I had to smile as it is a spring ritual. I will always take them happily as it will only be a few more years till it stops completely. The kids get such joy out of picking the dandelions. Their bright faces beaming as they hold those flowers out are so pure and sweet and have a look of such selfless joy and pride. A task and accomplishment that is all self directed.



I forget about this annual giving process every year until one of my monkeys toddles up to me (well OK they are not really toddling anymore but I'm painting a picture here) and holds out a grubby little hand clenching a handful of broken dandelions to me. "Here mommy, for you." (Now the white ones are never shred they get blown but the yellow are for giving. I take them with joy even when I am bogged down with the carry bag, gym bag, roll mat, lunch box, glitter picture still wet with glue, a juice cup, a water bottle and my keys.



Here's to all you moms out there we have an impossible yet fabulous job, and while it is most often under appreciated, here's to hoping you get a handful of weeds this year.

Happy Mother's Day

Waiting

I guess lately I haven't felt that there is much to write about as we are in a bit of a limbo. Almost done with school as an organized government entity. I have been "checking out" so to speak in terms of really being concerned about what they are doing especially as I deem much of it busy work. Schnuckie5 in particular, as her pre-school is almost over I find we are playing hooky a lot more (today in particular) in fact we have missed 3 of the last 4 days, one for a valid reason but Friday and today because I am being lazy. Not really great as we ARE still paying the bill. I have not have the motivation to go to the gym as I am not feeling well. That along with her apathy to school in general seems to cinch the deal. Maybe I am trying out less structure (if that is the case we are failing as we have really not been accomplishing much).

I am in a bit of a limbo and waiting: for school to end, for homeschool to begin, for summer plans to be made, for Birthday season to be over. I have been busy busy busy but who isn't? I think that I am getting closer to getting all my curriculum complete. Papaschnuck seems to be muttering and measuring in the room for desk space and bookcases a little more and I guess we are moving forward. It has all been a bit anticlimactic as the waiting seems never ending, everyday there is nothing new to write as I am still waiting, yet I cannot imagine beginning today. This has me interested of course as I wonder what is the reluctance? Why not start tomorrow? Today. What is the big deal? I think I am still scared. Worried about my ability to manage 4 the educational needs of all of them, being organized enough, actually getting things done, and handling that Schnuckie3 who is so consuming regarding attention and time. Intellectually, I know I can do it but there will be a learning curve. Emotionally, I have all my fears, apprehensions, hopes and dreams. Divergent feelings at odds with each other settling to a tentative balance. I guess I am feeling more peaceful that I can do this and will do this.

Either way we are headed forward, getting closer and moving on.

Birthday Season marches on

Happy Birthday Schnuckie7

How is it that time goes so quickly? Birthday after birthday, pants getting shorter and boys getting taller. It is hard to believe (once again) that these guys are growing up so very quickly. Only one more birthday thes year and Birthday Season will be over for the Schnucks for another year. Today it is my sweet second child who is celebrating. My happy-go-lucky, good-natured, math guy is having his birthday. He is so smart and so sweet and so loving. Mostly he is joyful nut clouds can darken the sunny sky of his mood. He can be oh so stubborn (Wherever does he get that from??) with a will of iron. His grump and grimace is worn fiercely upon his face when he is unhappy and only fades away when he decides it is time to return to joy. Happily it does not make itself known on a regular basis. Schnuckie (now) 7 is such a joy to have around. His cheerful personality and smile is enough to make me put down my paper and grab a quick hug, almost always given without reserve and accompanied with a quiet, "I love you mom".

My Schnuckie 7 is the reason I finally decided to Homeschool. He is the one that is most looking forward to it and is the biggest reason I am hoping for success. His quick little brain and bright little spirit makes me want to push him forward to see him grow and learn. I pray that I am able to give him the direction and support he needs to make the most of his gifts.

I LOVE YOU SWEETHEART
Happy Happy Birthday!

Buying books

Shopping is fun, well maybe not for all people but I really like it. I don't get much time to do the kind of shopping that I enjoy (long pondering excursions, poring over value, comparing prices wandering up and down the aisles). Most of my shopping seems to entail throwing things in the cart, trying to get through the checkout and back home in as short a time as possible. Coupon clipping and price per ounce calculations have given way to speed and making a mental vow to check for a better value next time.

For buying curriculum however, things have become a bit more tricky. I have been having to spend hours on line, reading reviews, attempting to make good choices about what style of learning may benefit one Schnuckie vs another. Trying hard to guess what level each may be, how independently they might be able to learn, and what additional supplement and practice might they need to progress with any particular program. It is all quite time consuming and much too much uncertainly regarding the overall success rate of any particular item I decide on. I am a tactile shopper by nature, I like to pick it up, look underneath, inside, feel it and sometimes even smell it. I like to know what I am getting before I fork over my money. As a neophyte, used curriculum shopping puts all that out the door, and I am sending checks to strangers, buying sight unseen, and overall forging new ground with every purchase. So far, I have received everything I have paid for and most people have been very kind, generous with advise and overall helpful.

I have been given a few suggestions about buying and I am trying hard to follow them all. Two jumped out as I heard them from many sources. First:

Don't become to invested in any one program, even if you love and it and think it is perfect, your kid may hate it. Some curriculum may not suit their style or their temperament. Be prepared to scrap everything and try something new.

This is definitely not my strong suit. I like to know way ahead what I am going to do and feel pretty sure it will work out, However, it also makes purchasing easier as I console myself with reassurances that it's OK if it is awful, I can always buy a different one and 'I'll do better next time'. (when you know better, you do better) Second piece of advice I got:

Do not buy too many things at once. It is easy to go overboard and get far more that you need and end of wasting money.

On this bit of wisdom, I figure that I have enough kids that if I overbuy for one, it may work out later with another one. But it is easy to see getting out of hand and it is very tempting to just buy buy buy. I have my guest bed covered with curriculum and workbooks at the moment trying to be sure I have things for everyone. I am finding that it really very to start from scratch, never seeing the books, and trying to get complete curriculum for all 4 kids. Well OK, at least for 3 of them. But I am going my footing and while a few things I have bought do not look so great, most of what I have picked has gotten me excited to begin.

The hardest purchase was the first one and now I am finding it almost easy (Paypal, and all), Well, no more time to waste blogging, back to shopping.....

What are you wearing?

I remember a few years ago I was in the mall on a quiet afternoon and I began to hear a clomping sound. CLOMP.........CLOMP.......CLOMP....... I turned around and saw a well put together woman striding along. Trailing 10 feet behind her, was a pretty, well dressed yet disheveled young girl, maybe 4 or 5 years old. Wearing one white tattered sneaker and one high heeled pink plastic Barbie shoe. CLOMP.... CLOMP..... CLOMP.... She strode along, determined to keep up with her mother and not at all concerned with her lopsided gait. I snuck a quick peek back at the mother who seemed oblivious to the fact that her daughter was so mismatched and unkempt. The mom seemed not to have a care in the world and her nonplussed attitude stuck me as somewhat odd given the fact that her daughter was such a spectacle. Of course, this was before I had children and had not yet realized that some battles are best left un-fought. I think of this woman often, and have grown over the years to admire her and realize that she possessed not a level of ignorance as I had initially thought, but rather a level of understanding that I have only recently begun to appreciate.

I have been on the receiving end of disapproving stares as my youngest Schnuckie has shown a fierce determination to wear only only those outfits by which he deems appropriate. There are many times I decide that the battle over clothes is simply not worth the time and if he chooses not to wear a coat in 12 degree temperature, so be it, he must carry his coat but if he want to be cold , OK. Of course, there are times I do have to draw the line no matter how fierce the opposition, like "No shorts in a snowstorm" but mostly I allow him this small indulgence, I figure he will figure it out and dress normal soon enough.



Now the older Schnuckie boys couldn't care less what they wear (as long as its not pink), in fact there are days I will mix up outfits at the end of the bed and inevitable my oldest will come downstairs dressed in his younger brother' clothes with sleeves ending at his elbows and pants hovering mid-calf, and he will be clueless as to what the problem is when questioned about his attire. When I will finally point out that he is wearing his brother's clothes he will them make the case that it is OK and he doesn't care (because he does not want to waste the time to change his clothes) but he will change when asked. Then along came the only girl. She has very strong opinions about her clothing but it is usually to lobby against dresses or a particular shirt, not for strange outfits. She can usually be soothed by showcasing two different outfits and allowing her to pick one. Lately she has become concerned with matching colors. Combing her hair is our bigger battle, but that's another story.


It was not until the youngest of the Schnuckies who, either by virtue of me spoiling him rotten or merely my exhaustion over the other more important things (like not having him climb up the outside of the stair railing), which has made him decide that he will only wear a few outfits without vehement protest. His favorite, any soccer outfit (his brothers old very large uniforms) cobbled together with soccer shorts (yes they MUST be shorts) from Goodwill. If he is particularly feisty, he will insist on cleats as well (instead of sneakers.) which are a few sizes to big, and occasionally the odd piece of sporting equipment for good measure (a ball or helmet, or even shin guards over ridiculously long large socks). Other variations on that theme include a lacrosse uniforms a swim shirt (I have convinced him it is a soccer shirt) or an ugly blue football mesh shirt he found at Goodwill. More traditional acceptable clothing includes turtlenecks (I have no explanations for that), any shirt with sports equipment on it and 'big boy ' pants (jeans). Hats of all kinds are coveted and worn, he had a day recently, following his sisters' preschool field trip to Giant Supermarket, where he wore the paper deli hat everywhere. Non-traditional choices of clothing include his sister's dress-up princess wear, and another favorite, either brother's cub scout uniform (belt and all). Doesn't matter if he is a Tiger, a Bear, or a Wolf, as long as it is proper dress wear and all parts and pieces are in place. I image with the oldest entering Weeblos we will see a new push for khaki this year.


So I handle it all in the best way I can, mostly by not handling it much at all. It is a wise mother who can look at her child and accept the outer package in whatever state it may be in. It is an even wiser (and might I say braver) who can also allow said child out in public in that same condition. So I now proudly march in front of him, purposefully ignoring whatever creation he may have on and allowing others to look and judge. And while I do give a wide latitude to what is acceptable I do insist on one thing, you have to wear something........ (well usually).